raw

i've been working downtown for the last week or so, doing exactly what i wanted. working at queen and spadina at a clothing store, breathing in the life and exploring as much as i can. although i'm doing everything i wanted to be doing, there still seems to be a pretty big void. there are so many things i want to do this summer, art festivals, photography exhibitions, concerts, dj shows, restaurants and bars/lounges to go to. so much to do and all the time in the world to do it, but no one else who will want to join me. i think that might be my biggest problem with etobicoke, it's not difficult to go downtown and to do things, the problem is finding people who have also been willing to escape the bubble that is etobs.
i once had someone who was willing to come with me to do all of these things, he would come with me to the shows and the art galleries, we'd stand and stare at beautiful art together and then sit with yummy chai lattes while we discussed them all. we'd go to the shows hopped up on drugs and dance together without a care in the world. it didn't matter what anyone else wanted to do, we could do it together.
my problem isn't getting downtown this summer
my problem isn't etobicoke this summer
my problem is not having you this summer to do all the things i want
my problem is that you will get to do all the things we would have done together, but with someone else.
that void i'm feeling is the hole from not having you.